I suddenly wanted to start a blog cuz I want to vent. I always wanted to blog but never really got to it. But finally today i lost my mind and thought not anymore. So here I am.
My life is a fucking mess. Not compared to the actually really fucked up lives but it’s fucked for me so yeah. Now i just want to make some intellectual friends or acquaintances and explore stuff cuz I’ve realised everybody around me is growing up except me. I’m 24 fyi. But my mind is 14 you could say. I mean I’m really mature and shit but i like to be a kid at the same time. It’s soothing. Like i have no worries or commitments n stuff. But sadly I do. And i dont want to. That’s where I’m losing my mind. Cuz i dont want to grow up. It’s fucking mental. I’ve never been in a legit relationship. I’ve just been in like brief phases or flings or whatever they’re called. Never a serious one. And now suddenly I want a serious one. Idk why. My mom says it’s just my biological clock that’s ticking and craving for opposite sex love and attention. Maybe she’s right. Maybe that’s why people were married off in their early twenties or even earlier in the olden days. For the raging sex drive. Everyday i discover a piece of information that just proves our ancestors were way smarter than us and knew a whole lot of shit too aside from being narrow minded at times. But i guess that was a given then. Now it’s different. Its fascinating. Idk what I’m typing. My fingers have a mind of their own. I’m blabbering. But yet somehow I still don’t feel light. Still feeling heavy. Maybe I need me some good old school lovin’. Is that pathetic or just normal? Or is normal pathetic? Shit. I just blew my own mind people! My back hurts. Kbye 🐳